Walking out of Pape Station, Dung Dodger was telling me that he can tell it’s a full moon simply by looking at it. I told him that was just left wing, tree hugging, new age nonsense and that the proper way is to look at a fishing calendar. I’ve since discovered another method. Apparently you can tell it’s a full moon when a large chunk of the pack shows up after chalk talk. This was the certainly the case at Gabby’s on Danforth last Friday.

It was nice to see local girl and big time backslider Morehead sitting at a table. As Stuporman once said “we can always use more head on trail”. I pledge however that her feeble attempts to flatter the hash scribe won’t shield her from the wrath of my Smith Corona. Nice try, dude.

Hare Shampoo was kind enough to leave some marks outside of Gabby’s. One of these was “CB” which led an astute Birdbrian to speculate that the poor lad had become dyslexic... surely not the best of things in his line of work.

As the half minds bolted west along Danforth they bumped into webmaster extraordinaire Casket Case who’d been at the Bicycle Clinic in Parkdale looking for a cheap replacement for his beloved Supercycle.

As I was involved in a serious anthropological study about life at the back of the pack it didn’t bother me that the mob soon discovered the meaning of CB. In fact I’d only just begun to sip my traveller when they steamed towards me mumbling something about a check back 8. Only slightly less irritating than this was listening to New Shoez spin an enchanting yarn about a beer check in a porta potty. Charming.

I must say that I have a new found respect for those hashers such as Back Door Buzz and Shadow with DFL behind their names. It can’t be an easy way to go through life. Even more so when it’s a live hare. The checks aren’t marked and there is no sweeper to point them in the right direction. Hmmm... just like the FRB’s. Eventually however with perseverance, and the help of a strong signal from my handheld, we fought our way across Danforth to the Eton House. It looks like the Eton House has had a restaurant makeover since our last visit. Well maybe not a full restaurant makeover but at least they mopped the floor and finally ditched the smokers. I must give props to our lovely waitress Just Andrea who vowed to come to the next hash (yeah right) even though she spent 20 minutes talking to New Shoez.

After shushing the music man, the sad sack GM gave down downs to the hare, Wet ’n Dirty for missing trail but finding the beer check, Shampoo and Flyer for marrying people of above average intelligence, Hand Maiden Back Door Buzz for being DFL, a parched Morehead for reminding everyone that she was a backslider and Casket Case for inappropriate dress.

After some detailed announcements the skittish pack headed back to Gabby’s for a stimulating evening of Scrabble and Trivial Pursuit.